Skinny / “Fat” -Healthy/ Unhealthy? According to whom?
(Re: The singer Adele’s recent weight comment controversy
Regarding the singer Adele, Why can’t a person just be recognized simply for their talent, achievements, and most importantly – who they are? Why does weight need to come into play?
All discrimination, generalizing, stereo-typing, over-emphasizing, etc. is something to reflect on, caution against, and work toward changing. Sometimes it could be we may need to reflect on ourselves and question that if we do this, is it because of a root issue from within…..possibly overcompensation from some unresolved pain of our own? Are we the ones not feeling valued or good enough that we need to minimize, categorize, or degrade someone else?
We just never know why a person’s weight is the way it is. Nothing is ever black and white. The important thing is to be healthy and to keep in good practice to never assume anything about anyone.
Below is a Guest Blog from a woman I have a lot of respect for. I’ve always found her to be honest, yet open and teachable. She is not afraid to share her feelings and express herself. I’ve read some of her other posts and she always came from a place of genuine questioning and curiosity, while trying to remain objective. I think what she wrote about below is something that many people have thought about at one time. ~Thuy
*Guest Blog by Amanda Mitchell (Regarding The singer Adele’s recent weight controversy)
Dear Adele Brigade,
As someone who loves Adele’s music and happens to think she’s a beautiful woman. I understand where the sentiment comes from and that, if you care at all about high fashion or celebrity or whatever, it can be depressing to stare at a bunch of rail-thin models all the time. But I don’t think its okay to contribute to this whole “war on skinny bitches” that seems to be gaining momentum among so-called “average” people. What the people who sell the images of skinny models AND the people like you fail to realize is that women come in all shapes and sizes, not just super-skinny or “curvy.” And thin women are women too. As someone with an A-cup who’s on the thin side of average, I’m just as offended by the suggestion that “real men like curves” as much as you may be offended by the way the media over-represents skinny people. You can’t have it both ways. Either you celebrate a healthy body image or you don’t. “Skinny” does not necessarily equal “shallow and sick,” and “fat” does not necessarily equal “sexy and healthy.”
Also, Adele doesn’t represent average women everywhere, Adele represents herself: a wealthy, award-winning, artfully made-up, professionally coiffed, insanely talented and promising singer who appears on the same magazine covers as the size zero models she seems to resent so righteously.
I don’t realize how positive my relationships are sometimes, but among my friends (especially female) there’s a kind of unspoken rule about being nice to yourself and others. One of my best friends, Maureen, is especially good about this. She has a young daughter, and she wants to make sure she grows up around people who don’t put themselves down, because how many of us learned to do that from other people, you know? I’ve sat in a room and listened to women out-negative each other about themselves and I see the beauty in Mo’s approach. And, honestly, when I spend time with her and her little girl and our friend Heather, I leave feeling great about myself and my friends. It’s a powerful thing. I love her too, but I don’t think her beauty or talent would be in any way diminished if she were thin, nor is her beauty or talent diminished because she isn’t, you know?
I just don’t really understand why it’s bad to call somebody “fat” in a pejorative way, but it’s perfectly okay to hate on thin women and tell them to “eat a cheeseburger,” like they’re only thin because they don’t eat. I’m thin. I eat. I don’t eat a lot of junk food, but when I tell people that they react like the only reason I don’t eat junk food is because I’m obsessed with staying thin. I eat the way I do to be healthy and feel good on the inside as well as the outside, and my healthy size is on the thin side of average. It’s not necessarily true for someone else, but it is true for me, so being told to “eat a cheeseburger” or being told that “real women have curves” like I’m doing something wrong seems silly to me. But I know a lot of people who bash thin girls like it’s some sort of feminism. It’s perfectly valid to question the images of women that are sold to us as being desirable and perfect, especially when they seem to lack variation (long hair, big boobs, long legs, nipped waist, etc.). I don’t think it’s valid to turn the complaints on actual people who represent one of many body types, though.
And for the record, I hardly ever get told to “eat a cheeseburger” because I’m not THAT skinny (also, I don’t really eat meat *laughs*). But I know several women who are very healthy (healthier than I am) and VERY thin. Like, people-assume-they’re-anorexic thin. And it’s as unfair to assume that about these nice, interesting people as it is to assume that “fat” people are lazy. But one stereotype (that skinny people need to eat more) seems to be more acceptable than the other (that heavy people need to eat less). It’s hardly ever that simple.
~Amanda Mitchell
